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"When the lunar module descended onto the moon's surface, it didn't scatter any dust and didn't leave a crater from the rocket blast that slowed its descent."

A reflective plate (colloidal silver? Mylar XL army survival blanket?) has been affixed to the side of an M-type asteroid orbiting Urth, which then projects light against a solar sail, resulting in an illusion we call "The Moon." The giant contraption cleverly conceals the real conspiracy--an underground (under the ground of the asteroid, that is) labor camp/detention facility for Urth's former occupants, the TELAHians, who have been punitively incarcerated for 70,000 years for the unforgivable crime of sharing ascension technology (binaural beats, horoscopes, neti pot, etc.) with Mankind. They push a massive subterranean crank wheel in circles forever. This generates 'electricity' which in turn keeps the Impostor Moon show up and running.

Rare History: There's a little dive bar up there, locals only. Crater 19, they call it. Best nebulobster this side of Andromeda-IV. Staffed by TELAHians born and raised in sl*very, sure, but you'd think they were getting paid 'cause the food is just so darn delicious.

Toil Dynamo: While Imposter Moon is in play, you have access to cheap, clean, sl*ve labor electricity.

"As seen on Ghost Suckers from truTV."

Mobile app for device integration and Ghost Wifi. Can be used to analyze samples collected form the Goop Vial, decode OdorTizerTM inputs, and much more. Android only.

REQUIRES: GhostTecTM Certification Card

Protective Seal: While this card is on your field, opponent cannot play any Ghost or Paranormal-type cards.

Our new line of body spray is jacked to the gills with CIA nanomacros designed to boost your Confidence IQ. After passing the blood-brain barrier, the NanoBits cause you to hallucinate supermodels who wink at you and bop their bums in the corners of your vision like sleep paralysis demons at all hours of the day.

SURGEON GEMERAL'S WARNING: Do NOT attempt to engage in sexual intercourse with MyGirls... MyGirls are for passive viewing and entertainment purposes only. Chasing or following MyGirls around corners will cause them to disappear like G-Man from Half Life.

AMERIKKKAN PSYCHIATRICKKK ASSOCIATION WARNINGG6: Do NOT inspect any love letters you discover from MyGirls. Looking too closely may cause the words to blur together, revealing them to be demonic sigils from Abaddon. Discontinue use of MyGirls immediately upon experiencing symptoms of cum-delusions including "P*rnjacking Gangstalking Sin-drome."

MyGirls will never whisper in your ear instructions for creating ammonium nitrate explosives.

Convincing Enough: Attach this item to any friendly creature capable of accepting ChromeWare with INT < 5. Creature is granted a permanent happiness buff (raise STR by 3 points).

The MyGirls MyGirlfriend Widget: Remotely install MyGirls MyGirlfriend Widget onto any opponent creature with either NRG < 4 or Groogle Grlrass equipped.
- Place a GF marker on the target card (use a soda can tab or similar piece of garbage--this is now the opponent creature's MyGirlfriend). The MyGirlfriend will hang out with and have simulated sex with the creature;
- Afflicted creature may not attack or defend after the activation of a MyGirlfriend girlfriend simulacrum entity;
- Creature may not hang out with his friends or have fun.

"Try rebelling while hogtied, citizen."

Net launcher. Nets are weighted with Mini Joe Rogan Monkeyhead Kettlebells - mini-stickies which tighten when thrown over a target. Manufactured by NETGEAR(r) (not the router company).

Popular less-than-lethal option for campus sieges.
Puts the B in BTK.

NETGEAR(r) IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR INJURY INCURRED WHILE USING THE RG-01 RESTRAINT NET LAUNCHER. NET IS NOT TO BE EATEN, CHEWED, OR CONSUMED IN ANY WAY. CONSUMPTION OF NET MAY RESULT IN TIED UP INTESTINES.

Stay_Put: Target is fired upon & wrapped up in plastic six pack rings and shibari rope the restraint net. Small chance to strangle and suffocate enemy.
  Stunned for two (2) turns;
  Roll d6. If 6, creature has its neck tangled tightly into the net, and is promptly Choked to Death.
  Robots/non air-breathing creatures cannot be suffocated.

Exclusive art created by the artist, Woah Jonny.

Join the Psychonaut Apes as they embark on an epic journey into a ground-breaking psychedelic Metaverse

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